Free Funny Jokes And Pictures » Relationship

Most Lethal Food

Free Jokes — Wed, 02 Sep 2009 07:50:16 +0000

A dietitian was once addressing a large audience in Chicago.

“The material we put into our stomachs is enough to have killed most of us sitting here, years ago.

Red meat is awful. Vegetables can be disastrous, and none of us realizes the germs in our drinking water.

But there is one thing that is the most dangerous of all and we all eat it. Can anyone here tell me what lethal product I’m referring to?”

“You, sir, in the first row, please give us your idea.”

The man lowered his head and said, “Wedding cake.”

0 To 200 In 6 Seconds

Free Jokes — Fri, 28 Aug 2009 06:53:55 +0000

Bob was in real BIG trouble as he forgot his wedding anniversary. Obviously, His wife was really pissed off.

She told him “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a GIFT in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!!”

The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway.

Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house.

She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

Bob has been missing since Friday.

What Goes 0 To 200 In 6 Seconds?

Why Did You Have To Die?

Free Jokes — Wed, 26 Aug 2009 09:13:06 +0000

A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, “Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?”

The first man approached him and said, “Sir, I don’t wish to interfere with your private grief, but this demonstration of pain is more than I’ve ever seen before. For whom do you mourn so deeply? A child? A parent?”

The mourner took a moment to collect himself, then replied, “My wife’s first husband.”